Polonium for Breakfast



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Hello. Looks like you've stumbled upon Polonium for Breakfast. Hope you enjoy your stay.

Okay, what even is this?

It's a repository of fiction set in the universe of Polonium for Breakfast, primarily stories and lore blurbs.

The universe is small and unlike our own. While there is an Earth, at no point in time was it identical to our own, and everything surrounding it is quite different.

The setting throws conventional logic out the window in favour of incoherent ramblings of conspiracy nuts, cartoon logic, and just silly nonsense in general.

Ah, so it's a site for lolrandom humour!

Eeeeeh... Not quite. There are some internal rules, a level of consistency. Suddenly shouting "ha ha cheese!" isn't enough to drive a narrative or hold a setting together.

It's also not exactly supposed to be a comedy. While it's not a serious work by any stretch of the imagination, Polonium for Breakfast prioritises maintaining its style and introducing fun concepts over focusing on humour. The situations and concepts themselves may feel inherently comical to some readers, but actual jokes only appear in moderate frequency.

Okay, enough introduction, where's the actual stuff?

Here! While minor spoilers are pretty much everywhere, anything that contains medium to major spoilers has spoiler warnings. Links that are grouped together indicate what isn't necessarily a series, but it is a set of closely related stories.

Stories

Mostly regular narrative prose, some experimental formats, nothing too wild. It's mostly just text.

Hot Bronze and Quick Prayers

Information and visuals

Lore blurbs, schematics, drawings, anything from worldbuilding to character bios. As long as it's more focused on information than storytelling, it goes here. Lots of text, some images.

Other media

This is reserved for anything that doesn't fit in the previous categories, like interactive stories or whatever. It's likely to stay empty for a while, if not forever.

So, who's behind all this, anyway?

Ah, I'm glad you asked. We're not ready to use our real names yet, and may never be, but the three people who end up reading this might want some way to refer to us.

This website and story are primarily the work of me, Vjeran Bogunović. I have written pretty much everything on this site, but it's not entirely a solo project.

I started writing bits and pieces set in this universe back in 2014 with the help of Hrvoje Horvat. While he hasn't written written anything directly, he has been part of the brainstorming and decision making process since day one, has provided some illustrations, and his thoughts and contributions have shaped the universe as a whole. He doesn't do much for it nowadays, but he played an important role in shaping the setting.

Polonium for Breakfast also incorporates minor ideas and suggestions from a man named John Tandrex Bucketface, such as the IDK&IDC chain and some uses for superpowers.

Overloaded from Athens and Joe from Ipswich have also provided some information about their home cities, letting me create alt-Earth mockeries of real places with a bit more knowledge of what I'm butchering. The Greek characters not having ridiculous names can also be blamed on Overloaded.

Though I can't list everyone who has read my works and provided feedback, it's important that I at least acknowledge them. Feedback is essential, and I'm thankful to everyone who has provided it.

As for everyone else who has read any of the works on this site, thanks for giving them a try. Hope you enjoyed them.

And finally, a disclaimer

Polonium for Breakfast uses uses some names of real world nations, locations, and organisations, as well as historical, political, religious, and folk figures. These are not meant to be representative of their original counterparts in any way. The names are merely used for the purposes of humour or familiarity.